...are only funny in fiction.
Seriously, how do you screw up a sunscreen so badly that people *catch fire* after using it?
It's a Banana Boat continuous spray. I've never liked continuous sprays (and prefer not to use any kind of spray if I can avoid it, as a lot of them contain toxic chemicals and the like). I'll stick to lotion.
On the other hand, the captive white whale who has learned to mimic human speech is fascinating. Especially as he's probably giving himself laryngitis every time he tries it.